1. Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.
2. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.
3. There are 2 theories to arguing with a woman...
neither works.
4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
5. Always drink upstream from the herd.
6. If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.
7. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket.
8. There are three kinds of men:
The ones that learn by reading.
The few who learn by observation.
The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence
and find out for themselves.
9. Good judgment comes from experience,
4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
5. Always drink upstream from the herd.
6. If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.
7. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket.
8. There are three kinds of men:
The ones that learn by reading.
The few who learn by observation.
The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence
and find out for themselves.
9. Good judgment comes from experience,
and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
10. If you're riding' ahead of the herd,
take a look back every now and then
to make sure it's still there.
11. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back in.
12. "Once, after eating an entire bull,
a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring.
He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him."
10. If you're riding' ahead of the herd,
take a look back every now and then
to make sure it's still there.
11. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back in.
12. "Once, after eating an entire bull,
a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring.
He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him."
The moral:
When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.
and
most importantly
13. NEVER squat with your spurs on!
(stolen from another blogger!)
(stolen from another blogger!)
25 comments:
Advice for the ages... I liked it!
I have found when I gain experience, it usually involves a few mistakes...
#9 is so true!
thanks for the laugh Kayla :)
Hi Buffalo,
I agree..if you're wise, you'll take the bad times and learn from them
Happy M Day
Hi Celeste,
Long time no see!
Glad you had some laughs
I LOVE the one about arguing with a woman! ;)
When will men learn!?>!?!?!?
Quite important: Don't eat yellow snow!
haha Some not bad there;-)
A good list, for the most part! And yes, arguing with a woman has caused much damage to Mr. Amulet over the years ...
This reminds me of the Jim Croce song: Bad, Bad Leroy Brown.
I've actually peed on an electric fence. I did it on a dare. Luckily, the fence was not activated, but we didn't know that.
P.S. I'm doing fine, so far. I find out tomorrow the results of a CT scan regarding a point of concern in my lungs. I'm putting my chips on scar tissue caused by the radiation therapy I went through.
kayla: a very good list. I've seen variants of it before but still gave me a good laugh. Thanks.
Dabich,
Some men will never learn!
Ratty's ghost,
Of course! very important to keep away from the yellow snow
Hutton,
My fave is # 12
Hi David,
Poor man..just learn to say "yes honey" and "you're right"
ha
Hi Neal,
And the baby bears a striking resemblance!
ha
Grunt,
You're kidding! You're luck to survive the fence peeing.
I pray it's just scar tissue..let me know, ok? Email me if you want to keep it private.
Hi Green,
It looks familiar to me too, but I didn't remember all of the list
Glad you had a laugh
:-)
I love the one about men who have to learn by peeing on a fence. Good stuff.
Yes, I do watch Lost. It's a fun show on many levels and their finales are usually damn good.
Those are fabulous. I think if you followed those tips you would have a pretty good life. But like everything it is easier said than done. One of my favorites along these lines is "An elevator smells different to a midget."
Look where your going, Know where you've been.
Very nice - I accept all your advice as usual!!
Here's another one to add:
It takes just as much energy to make excuses as it does to just do a thing.
Nothing Earth-shattering, but it makes sense to my students. It's a little loftier than Nike's "Just Do It."
Nice to see you back around!
By the way, your picture is gorgeous. At first I thought you were lovingly holding a baby's head, then I thought it was the off-focus ground/background, and now I think I finally recognize that as the wrist (inside or out?) of your other hand/arm (?). Please tell me if I'm right, because that little piece of your picture has been like a puzzle to me. Hehehehe. :)
Relieve me of my puzzlement and curiousity, Kayla!!! Thank you!
good words to live by
'Bout time for another post, don'tcha think? Hope all is well...
Hey Kayla, how you doin'?
I agree that it's time for a new post so we know you're still among the living.
Hope all is well.... ;>)
Hehe, very wise indeed! :]
I can't remember if I've asked you this already Kayla... but new profile pic maam?
Kayla!! This is great! And you could not have picked a better picture to go with this list! Love it!!
--snow
Happy fourth of July, Kayla.
hellooo? Anyone home?
[knock, knock] "Hellooooo?"
"Who's there?"
"I have no idea, but apparently it's not Kayla."
"Kayla who?"
"My point exactly."
Love these !! The best theory to arguing with a woman is DON'T...
Missing you... need to come around more often.
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